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जिंदगी गुजर गई सबको खुश करनेमें ... जो खुश हुए वो अपने नहीं थे ... जो अपने थे वो कभी खुश नहीं हुए ...

Saturday, December 22, 2018

Good Thoughts B

बिनधास्त जगा मित्रांनो
                   
●एकदा का चाळिशी पार केली की "जास्त शिकलेला" आणि "कमी शिकलेला" दोघेही सारखेच ...
(कमी शिकलेला कदाचित जास्त पैसे कमावत असेल)

●पन्नाशीनंतर तर "सुंदर" आणि "कुरूप" हा भेदभावच नष्ट होतो....दोन्ही सारखेच
(कोण कितीका सुंदर असेना या वयात सुरकुत्या, डोळ्यांभोवतालची काळी वलये लपता लपत नाही )

●साठीनंतर तर "मोठी पोस्ट" आणि "लहान पोस्ट" असेही काही उरत नाही....दोन्ही सारखेच
(निवृत्तीनंतर तर ऑफीसातला प्यूनदेखील साहेबाला बघायचे टाळतोच.)

●सत्तरी पार केल्यानंतर "मोठे घर" आणि "लहान घर" असा विचार सुद्धा मनात येत नाही....दोन्ही सारखेच
(सांधेदु:खी बळावून हालचाल करणे मुश्किल झाले कि बसण्यापूर्ती जागा असली तरी पूरे.)

●ऐंशीनंतर गाठीशी "भरपूर पैसा" असला काय अन् नसला काय.... दोन्ही सारखेच
(जरी पैसा खर्च करावासा वाटला तरी स्वतःसाठी कुठे अन् कसा खर्च करावा हा मोठा प्रश्न ऊरतोच )

●नशीबाने नव्वदी पार केली (अभिनंदन) तर "झोपणे" आणि "उठणे" यांत सुद्धा फरक राहत नाही...दोन्ही सारखेच
(कारण उठून बसल्यावर आता करायचे काय हा गहन प्रश्न उरतोच)

अजुन शंभरी पार करायची ईच्छा आहे का ?

जीवन साधे-सरळ-सोपे आहे...उगाच नेहमी कुठले तरी गहन कोडे सोडवल्याचा आइन्स्टाइनचा आव आणू नका.

एक लक्षात ठेवा...लांब पल्ल्याच्या शर्यतीत आपण सगळे समानच आहोत तेव्हा निर्भेळ आनंद लुटा, हसा.
स्वतःसाठी काही वेळ तरी जगायला शिका, कारण...... जिंदगी ना मिलेगी दोबारा.

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‏Pablo Neruda,Spanish poet, ‏Nobel Prize for Literature in 1971, His Poem:

"You start dying slowly"

‏You start dying slowly ;
‏if you do not travel,
‏if you do not read,
‏If you do not listen to the sounds of life,
‏If you do not appreciate yourself.
‏You start dying slowly:

‏When you kill your self-esteem,
‏When you do not let others help you.
‏You start dying slowly ;

‏If you become a slave of your habits,
‏Walking everyday on the same paths…
‏If you do not change your routine,
‏If you do not wear different colours
‏Or you do not speak to those you don’t know.
‏You start dying slowly:

‏If you avoid to feel passion
‏And their turbulent emotions;
‏Those which make your eyes glisten
‏And your heart beat fast.
‏You start dying slowly:

‏If you do not risk what is safe for the uncertain,
‏If you do not go after a dream,
‏If you do not allow yourself,
‏At least once in your lifetime,
‏To run away.....
‏You start dying Slowly

Love yourself ‏-----Love your life .........

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The best message 

A man, an avid Gardener saw a small Butterfly laying few eggs in one of the pots in his garden.

Since that day he looked at the egg with ever growing curiosity and eagerness.

The egg started to move and shake a little.

He was excited to see a new life coming up right in front of his eyes.

He spent hours watching the egg now.

The egg started to expand and develop cracks.

A tiny head and antennae started to come out ever so slowly.

The man's excitement knew no bounds.

He got his magnifying glasses and sat to watch the life and body of a pupa coming out.

He saw the struggle of the tender pupa and couldn't resist his urge to "HELP".

He went and got a tender forceps to help the egg break, a nip here, a nip there to help the struggling life and the pupa was out.

The man was ecstatic!

He waited now each day for the pupa to grow and fly like a beautiful butterfly, but alas that never happened.

The larvae pupa had a oversized head and kept crawling along in the pot for the full 4 weeks and died!

Depressed the man went to his botanist friend and asked the reason.

His friend told him the struggle to break out of the egg helps the larvae to send blood to its wings and the head push helps the head to remain small so that the tender wings can support it thru its 4 week life cycle.

In his eagerness to help, the man destroyed a beautiful life!

Struggles help all of us, that's why a bit of effort goes a long way to develop our strength to face life's difficulties!

As parents, we sometimes go too far trying to help and protect our kids from life's harsh realities and disappointments.

We don't want our kids to struggle like we did.

Harvard psychiatrist Dr. Dan Kindlon says that over-protected children are more likely to struggle in relationships and with challenges.

We're sending our kids the message that they're not capable of helping themselves.

To quote clinical psychologist, Dr. Wendy 's Moral:

"It  is  Our Job  to  prepare  Our  Children  for  the  Road & Not  prepare  the  Road for  Our Children"

All parents - do read it.

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10 Advices from a SC Judge who handled family dispute courts.

1:- Don't encourage your son and his wife to stay under same roof with you. Best to suggest them to move out, even to the extent of renting a house.  It's their problem to find a separate home.
More the distance between you and your children's families, the better is the relationship with your in laws.

2:- Treat your son's wife as his wife, not as your own daughter, maybe just treat her as a friend. Your son would always be your Junior  but, if you think that his wife is of the same rank and if you ever scolded her, she would  remember it for life.
In real life, only her own mother and not u will be viewed as a person qualified to scold or correct her.

3:- Whatever habits or characters your son's wife has is not your problem at all, it is your  son's problem. It isn't  your problem as he is an adult already.

4:- Even when living together, make each others businesses clear, don't do their laundry, don't cook for them and don't baby sit their children. Unless, of course, there is a special request by your son's wife and you feel that you're capable and don't expect anything in return.
Most importantly, you shouldn't worry about your son's family problems. Let them settle themselves.

5:- Pretend to be blind and deaf when your son and his wife are quarrelling.  It's normal that the young couple do not like their parents to b involved in the dispute between husband and wife.

6:- Your grandchildren totally belong to your son and his wife. However they want to raise their children,  it is up to them. The credit or blame would be on them.

7:- Your son's wife need not necessarily  respect and serve you. It is the son's duty.  You should have taught your son to be a better person so that you and your son's wife relationship could be better.

8:- Do more planning for your own retirement, don't rely on your children to take care of  your retirement. You had already walked through most of your journey in life, there are still a lot of new things to learn through out the journey.

9:- It is your own interest that you enjoy your retirement years.  Better if you could utilise & enjoy everything that you had saved before you die.  Don't let your wealth become worthless to you.

10:- Grandchildren don't belong to your family, they're their parents precious gift.

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My father gave me three pieces of advice to help me in life.

One day, my father cooked 2 bowls of noodles put the 2 bowls on the table. One bowl had one egg on top and the other bowl did not have any egg on top. He said ”My child. You choose. Which bowl do u want”. Eggs were hard to come by those days! We only got to eat eggs during festivals or New Year. Of Course I chose the bowl with egg! As we started eating, I was congratulating myself on my wise choice/decision. Then to my surprise as my father ate his noodles, there were TWO eggs at the bottom of his bowl beneath the noodles! I regretted so much! And scolded myself for being too hasty in my decision. My father smiled and said to me, ”My child. You must remember, what your eyes see may not be true. If u intend on taking advantage of people, u will end up losing!”

The next day, my father again cooked 2 bowls of noodles: one bowl with an egg on top and the other bowl with no egg on top. Again, he put the two bowls on the table and said to me, ”My child. You choose. Which bowl do u want?” This time I was smarter. I chose the bowl without any egg on top. To my surprise, as I separated the noodles on top, there was not even a single egg at the bottom of the bowl! Again my father smiled and said to me, ”My child, you must not always rely on experiences because sometimes, life can cheat u or play tricks on u. But u must not be too annoyed or sad, just treat this as learning a lesson.

The third day, my father again cooked 2 bowls of noodles, again one bowl with an egg on top and the other bowl with no egg on top. He put the 2 bowls on the table and again said to me, ”My child. You choose. Which bowl do u want?”. This time, I told my father, ”Dad, u choose first. You are the head of the family and contributed the most to the family". My father did not decline and chose the bowl with one egg on top. As I was eating my bowl of noodles, I was sure in my heart that there would be no egg inside the bowl. To my surprise! There were TWO eggs at the bottom of the bowl.

My father smiled at me with love in his eyes, ”My child, u must remember!When u think for the good of others, good things will always naturally happen to u!”

I always remember these  three pieces of advice!

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